How To Overcome Difficult Situations In Your Life
Are faced with a difficult situation? Do you need to make a hard decision? Are you looking for change but find it hard to make a choice?
Change is inevitable. Life will throw difficult circumstances at us. When push comes to shove, you and I, must make decisions that are hard to bear mentally and emotionally.
Recently, I had to make a few difficult choices. In 2014, when I started my Public Speaking business I had a vision. My vision was to help the youth of South Africa to become responsible leaders that influence the success of the nation in a positive way.
I was so excited when I set out to make this vision a physical reality. My decision to go in this direction was based on the research I had done and my own personal experiences in life.
As a young person, I made a lot of bad choices which negatively affected me later in life. Below are some of the things I struggled with for fifteen years of my life.
1. Was dependant on drugs and alcohol
2. Could not keep a stable job
3. Spent long stretches of time without a job, sometimes for more than a year
4. I saw no progress in my life and career for many years after completing high school
5. Got into trouble with the law a couple of times, almost ended up in jail and having a criminal record
6. Tried to commit suicide because I was tired of making bad choices and hurting the people who love and care about me
Fast-forward to 4 years after I decided to take responsibility for my life. I had a burning desire to do something significant with my life. I did some research to see if there were opportunities to use my story to help the youth in my nation.
After doing my research I noticed that many of the youth in my nation had similar challenges to the ones I had previously struggled with. Then, the rest is history.
After two years and many periods of ups and downs I allowed myself to be side-tracked by difficult circumstances. Lost sight of the vision I had when I started my business. Instead of things getting better, they got worse. My life was filled with a lot of disappointments. One of the most difficult things I experienced was when I found out that I had been deceived by some of the people I trusted with information about the plans I had for my life.
The worst part is that they tried to cover up what they did. I couldn’t understand why things would go wrong every time I would share information about my plans. They did not stop when I told them that their actions were very oppressive.
My biggest mistake was choosing to deal with the pain by using drugs. I knew I was choosing the easy way out but still did it anyway. That had been a way of escape in times past. Like many who use drugs, I told myself that I was unwinding and having a little fun.
I do not blame anyone for my choice to use drugs again. I know I could have dealt with the situation differently. I allowed myself to be negatively influenced by what other people did to me.
I thank God that I could get immediate help from my friend’s parents. They run an organisation that helps recovering drug addicts my old neighbourhood. It is called The Place of Healing and Refuge. And I certainly found a place where I experienced healing and refuge while I spent time with them. I am extremely grateful for the help and support they gave to me.
I decided to relocate to Johannesburg because I wanted to make a new start away from the environment I was in. It was a hard decision because there was no promise of any work for my business.
The main thing I was fighting in Durban was people around me did not think I was making the right decision when I started my public speaking business. They would pretend to support me so that they could get information about my plans. Then they would use that information to secretly work against me when tried to make progress in my life.
I made a choice for forgive them and distance myself from them because they felt that it was fine to continue trying stop me from pursuing my purpose in life. I was tired of the deception, manipulation and control I was experiencing.
Taking drugs after six years of staying clean was hard for me to deal with. I felt like I had disappointed myself and the people who viewed as a role model. It has taken nine months to recover from this experience. I had to constantly work hard to overcome the shame, guilt and pain.
I got my final breakthrough in recovery when I went for a weekend at Fisherman’s Village in Randburg. A friend booked a place for me at the event three weeks after I arrived in Johannesburg. The event was called Overcoming Through Christ (OTC). I walked away the overcomer I was born to be.
Now I want to give you a few ideas that will help you overcome your difficult situation. I have included a list of keys that you can implement immediately in your life.
1. Take responsibility for your choices
Each choice we make is either moving us away or towards our desired vision for life. We cannot choose how people decide to treat us. But we can choose how we respond to their treatment. We cannot choose the circumstances life throws at us. But we can choose our response towards those circumstances. Taking responsibility for your choices will help you make the changes you need in your life.
2. Make the necessary changes
Making change is hard. We naturally want to stay within our comfort zone. Sometimes change requires us to make some painful choices. Taking the first step towards change is the hardest. After making that first step towards your new goal you will start to see it becoming more and more easier. Change will have a different meaning to everyone. Maybe you will need to change your eating habits, or change the way to respond to difficult circumstances, or start doing different things in your career or business. Remember, don’t make a permanent decision for a temporary moment of pleasure. It might take away the pain but it could cause permanent damage to your life. If you are going to make changes in your life they need to have positive results in the long run. Bear the pain for a moment and experience log-term pleasure.
3. Be patient with yourself
Life is a marathon, not a sprint. If you are still alive then you have a change get it right the next time. Try to take it one day at a time. Be quick to forgive yourself if you make a mistake. Learn from it and move on. We all need to learn how to fail forward fast. A righteous person falls seven times but keeps getting up. Don’t focus on what other people are doing. Stick to your lane and work on being the best version of YOU. The only competition you have is YOU. You cannot compete with anyone else because they are busy being themselves. You are the only one who can set the pace for your life. Because you know your strengths and weaknesses. A journey of a thousand kilometres is taken one step at a time.
4. Keep your focus
Don’t allow distractions to take you away from your vision. There are many voices out there calling for our attention. We need to listen the ones that will direct us towards the vision that we have set for our lives. Your vision for your life will act like a compass directing you towards your preferred destination in life. Keeping your focus will help you reach your destination. You will stay in YOUR lane in the race and will finish with a prize. If each of us focused on staying in our lanes we will all finish the race with a prize. Why? Because everyone is running their own race in life. You win if you finish the race. You get the prize for fulfilling your purpose in life.
5. Don’t rely on your own strength
Many of us fail to apply this principle into our lives, careers and businesses. We cut ourselves off from an unlimited supply when we rely on our own strength. The we are facing in life is a spiritual one. With God, we can accomplish infinitely more than we can ask, think or imagine. We can achieve more because we have supernatural strength to help us overcome every obstacle before us. One of my favourite scriptures from the Bible is, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” It does not matter what we face in life, if we allow God to help us we will overcome every difficult circumstance.
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